THINKING TOO MUCH
Thinking too much means that you are literally thinking for too long. You spend too much time thinking about what you’re thinking about. Especially in the negative thoughts, far too much time is often invested. Whether it’s thoughts about the future or the past.
Because thinking often happens unconsciously, you often don’t realize that you have been thinking for so long. Sometimes you spend hours thinking. You keep thinking and worrying about a certain subject.
Maybe you can say you’re addicted to it. Addicted to negative thoughts.
This overthinking doesn’t just happen. Apparently, there is a mechanism in your head that causes this thinking too much. This mechanism easily gets a grip on your thinking the moment you:
-) tired (burnout)
-) does something you don’t want to
-) feels that something is not right
-) are unsure
I’ve noticed that these are moments where I think a lot and for a long time. It also doesn’t matter what the thinking is about. Whether it is about:
-you name it.
I could think about anything for a long time, as long as it had a negative undertone. That was the common denominator. I thought negatively. Apparently, I liked or needed to think this way.
I didn’t really keep an eye on the time. But it took a lot of effort. I could think all day about a colleague or the war in the Ukraine. No problem at all.
I did notice that I was thinking more in certain places than in others. Especially when I was alone, I was extra sensitive to these thoughts. Consider:
-in bed at night
-in the car
-in the shower
-working in the garden
These places, along with the circumstances, caused me to walk around with negative thoughts for a long time.
One of the most important discoveries was that it happens mostly unconsciously.
Subconsciously, I was immersed in negative thoughts.
To get that under control, I started to delve into this substance. I eventually came to the conclusion that I would do well to expose my negative thoughts. That I was trying to take the negative charge off the thought.
Here’s how I did it.
In the evening after dinner, I sat in my burnout room and took one or two thoughts I had that day. I wrote these down in short keywords. Then I went on to try to get the load out of the thought.
I tried the thought:
-to think (look at it in a different way)
-to think about what was positive about the thought
-look at it objectively and wonder what I could do about it (War in Ukraine)
-so that I wondered if this thought was contributing to my recovery
Most of the time I managed to remove the negative charge quite nicely. If I couldn’t, I put the thought away for a while, only to come back to it the next day. Often the negative charge disappeared.
The funny thing was, when I got rid of the negative charge, the whole thought started to disappear.
I also started working with the unconscious. I did it in a similar way. At a number of times during the day, I consciously started to see what I was thinking.
I had planned to do that 3 times. Around 9.30-13.00-18.00. Just fifteen minutes trying to study my thoughts. And then trying to expose the negative thoughts at that moment.
In the beginning, which was quite disappointing. I didn’t feel like it, I really wanted to keep thinking negatively, I also looked for people who fed me, etc.
But I wanted to persevere. I battled my unconscious negative thoughts.
I forced myself to stop at these times and study my thoughts just like in the evening in my burnout room.
In order to keep reminding myself of this struggle, I had resolved to set a goal. I wanted to be an example for my children in positive thinking.
I took a hair band from my daughter and put it on my wrist. So that I could regularly remember that I was doing this not only for myself, but also for my environment.
To keep motivating myself to do this, I have a music app on my phone. With texts that push my thinking back. A kind of meditation, mindfulness app. Which aims to focus on what IS NOW. Because in the now there is nothing negative to think.
You always think negatively about the future or the past, but never about the present. Unless you’re sick or have a flat tire. That’s annoying now…
I noticed that this approach was starting to work. By practicing, analyzing and maintaining it, I start to get the idea that I am on the right track.
Less and less, I think negatively. And more and more often I think about what is now. I now drink a cup of coffee, write this text, sit on a chair now, etc.
Growing into a situation of less negative thinking.
The special thing is that this feels good.
Without the negative thoughts, my life seems a lot more fun. I feel better, feel better about myself and have energy left over. I even feel happy sometimes….
I want to keep that feeling, so I’m going to try to hold on to this.
Try to think less negatively. And if you still want to get rid of it, get actively working on it!!